BOING AND WOW EXPLAIN CLIMATE CHANGE

I was looking at a Liar-for-Hire website that purports to refute the notion of global climate change. Among other gems it claimed the sun was too hot to emit in the measly low energy infrared wavelengths. In other words, it said the sun is too hot to give off heat. As an aside, the median wavelength the sun does emit is green. The same site also said it doe not matter if the amount of carbon dioxide in the atmosphere is doubled, because that does not increase the amount of infrared radiation it absorbs. It just absorbs the same amount in half the distance, with no change in temperature.
That was just more than I could take. Then as I thought about it I realized I was not completely sure how greenhouse gases produce a warmer atmosphere. I know the atmosphere is transparent to most higher energy wavelengths (except ultraviolet, big thanks to ozone there). That energy heats the earth which then takes its cut and gives off infrared radiation as change. Those infrared photons, given a clear horizon, would shoot straight out into space without a fare thee well and leave us a tiny bit colder. The greenhouse gases grab their favorite photons out of the traffic and stuff them into their little atomic pockets. There, the photons scream and squirm and bite right through the fabric of space-time until the gas lets them go. When the photons pop out again they are just as likely to be pointed at the ground as the sky. If there are too many carbon dioxide molecules the photon is quickly snapped up and shoved in another atomic pocket. This goes on and on until the poor photon is just in tears and everyone is sweaty and agitated.
That analogy might be going a bit far but this is Lay Science. The above paragraph is the "lay" part. For "science" I am going to get a little more precise. I am not a physicist so any specialist who thinks the sun is hot enough to give off heat may please comment.
In reference to my original complaint: even if absorbed in half the distance the infrared photons still do something to the greenhouse molecules. Since all this is happening at the atomic scale all transactions are in quanta. Carbon dioxide, methane and water all use different wavelengths within the infrared class. That is because the absorption bumps the electrons around specific orbits with specific energies. The electrons are not knocked loose at these energies, they just go BOING and WOW.
For linear molecules like carbon dioxide (O=C=O) the bonds on one side of the carbon stretch like a spring then boings back and forth. At a lower energy the bonds will not stretch, but the whole molecule wobbles like a piece of sheet metal held in two hands and shaken at arm's length, giving the wow motion. A methane molecule is not linear but is more pyramid shaped. (not C-H-H-H-H ). I read an article by someone with good intentions who said methane is a more powerful greenhouse gas because it is bigger than carbon dioxide. Two oxygens weigh more than four hydrogens, so I don't know about that. I think methane heats up more because it has four single bonds to four whippy little hydrogens that can boing and wow in all directions at once. But don't take my word for it. The formulas describing the kinds of molecular motion, where N=the number of atoms, is: 3N-5= modes in a linear molecule, and 3N-6= modes in nonlinear. Plug in the numbers and carbon dioxide has 4 modes of boing and wow, while methane has 9.
Where does that all lead? Boing and wow are motion and motion is heat. One definition is: Temperature is the average speed of atoms and molecules. The greenhouse gasses are twitching and jumping and smacking into other non-greenhouse molecules. They all start bouncing round the room. When they slow again they cool by emitting an infrared photon. That photon can be reabsorbed and start more molecular motion. Does this matter?
In the book "One, Two Three...Infinity" George Gamow calculated a photon, produced in the core of the sun and moving at the speed of light, will take 5000 years of random absorption and re-emission to lurch 700,000 kilometers to the surface of the sun. From there it is about 8 minutes zipping 149,000,000 kilometers to us. The more carbon dioxide there is the more infrared at 4 and 15 microns we have unable to leave the planet. The more methane, the more infrared at 3.5 and 8 microns. The two don't steal from each other. Water catches just about everything else from .8 to 10 microns (re-emission? reabsorption? Think oceans). Among the three of them infrared photons don't stand a chance of leaving unhindered. They are caught again and again. The atmosphere warms and the climate changes. Don't argue. It is as plain as boing and wow.

FUN EXPERIMENTS TO DO AT HOME

You can use this equation to determine molecular velocity in your own garden.

1/2 mv^2 = T(1.38 X 10^-23 joules per degree Kelvin) or,

the speed of the gas in your garden, statistically nitrogen, is one half the mass times the velocity squared, which equals the temperature in degrees Kelvin times the Boltzman constant. Zero degrees centigrade is 273 degrees Kelvin and can simply be added, if you don't own a thermometer scaled in Kelvins. (In the U.S. you're just out of luck).

This may sound silly but it is actually a crucial connection. Poor old Ludwig Boltzman gets kicked around a lot by climate change deniers. That is because the equation on this page directly relates temperature increase of the planet to the energy in molecules we can not even see. There is a direct relationship of infrared energy in equals increased molecular motion equals increasing temperature. It is not guess work. You can do it at home.